The ups and downs of life happen so fast. Sometimes they overwhelm us and form a constant stream of presence in our thoughts. That is happening for me at this time. I have trouble concentrating on other things. My beloved brother Arthur is unexpectedly very ill at 86. Arthur and his lovely wife Natalie recently moved to the north from Florida to be in the care of their son and family. Their loving daughter Erica had been near them in Florida. Moving to the colder climate was difficult but necessary and they were welcomed in the Northeast with warm and loving arms.
Counter to our expectations shortly after the move, Arthur became very ill and has undergone surgery. The hoped for good recovery may not be in the cards. My heart is heavy and we have received such caring responses from our greater family and friends. I know I am not at all alone in having a heavy heart, but I could not write about any other subject this week and have to share some thoughts. No one is exempt from this type of situation. You all have your own heart aches and losses to share. We can comfort each other just by expressing similar feelings. People look in so many places for solace or even answers, among those places are poetry, music, favorite quotes, religious support, folk lore, family and friends and our own memories. I look in all of these places as well but strong memories seem to fill most of my quest.
Arthur is my only sibling and several years older than I am. In my childhood, he was not around much, going off to school, the army, marriage and living in New England with a year in Italy and the birth of their son and in back in the States of their daughter.
Humorous episodes pop into my mind, the brown rectangular case held together with a strap that he brought home on holiday visits from college filled with dirty laundry. My mother cheerfully did his laundry (in an old style washer with wringer), hanging the wet clothes in the sun and lovingly folding them back into the brown case. His jazz quartet (he played the bass fiddle and banjo) rehearsed in our "parlor" next to the piano. I watched the rehearsals often, believing my 6 of 7 year self to be hiding out of sight from the top step of our staircase, peering through the railing slats.
Arthur served as 2nd Lieutenant in the US Army and was stationed stateside in White Sands, NM and then in Japan. I have since visited both places and quizzed him about his memories lf those places before my visits. Arthur and Natalie's wedding ceremony and much to my joy, being asked to sing a solo during the ceremony. I will not go on and on, I have written about some of these memories in the past.
As we await the next steps in New Jersey, still full of hope, I am sitting in my motor home in the lovely Palomar Mountains of southern California in a heavy day-long rainstorm rocking to the high winds. The rain is so welcome in this parched area, a source of hope and joy for the locals and a turnaround as well in the level of expectations for the hoped for drought relief. I take it as a sign that life goes on in unexpected ways and I leave you with perhaps some time think of your loved ones, and your quest for support. Not a new message, nothing exceptional, but I would love you to share your special memories. I turn to poetry, and music and the like, but for me, it is always the warm hearts of people that add so much during difficult times.
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